The concept of counseling. The psychology of counseling refers to a psychological specialty that helps people improve their quality of life and overcome mental health challenges. Not everyone believes in counseling. Not everyone successfully engages in counseling. Counseling most certainly isn’t magic. There are also many ways to achieve the goal of mental wellness. Although there are many routes to mental wellness, counseling remains a great process for individuals to cope with personal problems and mental or emotional distress. In addition, it’s a great way to learn about oneself, accept oneself, and put that understanding into practice to become happier.
When it doesn’t work. In my experience as a professional, when someone tries counseling and it isn’t successful and there is no specific diagnosed mental illness, one of the big reasons is due to the lack of energy put into the process. This can mean several things. It can mean that a person walked in not believing in the process, thus not engaging fully in the process. It can also mean that the process is not prioritized due to other life circumstances and the objective of survival being the focus. In addition, the lack of trust often exhibited in some communities and cultures often plays out in the therapy sessions. This is why it takes a good deal of time to build a therapeutic relationship and trust the clinician in leading you therapeutically. Following this, it will also take time to see the change and results that you seek via the intentional work that one is doing. Sometimes the time needed isn’t experienced.
Doing the work. Counseling requires engaging with a certain level of vulnerability, transparency and honesty. This is necessary to achieve change, feel a difference and work on deep rooted issues that may affect one in the present day. When this doesn’t happen, you incur surface level or superficial results. Therefore, even with the best clinician you will see no tangible results because you get what you essentially put into it. Again, counseling isn’t magic. As a mental health clinician, I personally don’t work to convince people to engage in counseling, but I can explain the benefits with a certain level of commitment and work.
Where to start. If you are new to counseling, use popular sites to search for a clinician. Be open to trying something new and commit to engaging in the counseling process. Don’t be afraid if you don’t connect with the first person you meet, instead go into the experience knowing that there is a clinician for everyone. It might take two tries to find that right fit. When looking for a therapist or counselor make sure to read their bios to see if their counseling philosophy aligns with your needs. Ask questions during your initial session. If possible, try to commit to 3 sessions before deciding it isn’t a good fit.
Author: Taifa McLarin MS, LPC, NCC
